Falling.
There is a recurring dream I have every so often. Actually its more a recurring end to dreams.
The beginning of the dream could be anything, it is always completely different. But eventually, I come to a ladder, and I have to climb it. I might have climbed the ladder earlier in the dream or I might not have seen it yet. It is a simple ladder, one sided, the type you might lean against a wall or a tree. I am completely alone, and I must climb this ladder, maybe to get onto a roof or, in the case of last nights dream, through a hatchway in cliff face. So I climb this ladder, its all fine on the way up, but then when I get to the top, I get worried. I am too scarred to take my hands off the ladder to open the hatchway, or climb onto the roof edge, or whatever the scenario might be. I carefully let go of the ladder with one hand and slowly stretch it out, only to pull it back at the last minute because I thought I felt the ladder wobble. This action is repeated for a while, and then, to my horror, I feel it. The ladder starts slowly to fall back, at first its only slight, I think I must be imagining it, but I still grip the ladder tighter, then after a few seconds of questioning panic, I am sure of it. I feel the ladder fall back, I feel myself falling, I can feel it in every part of my bod,y slowly at first then accelerating, faster and faster as I grip the ladder tighter to my chest, Falling faster and faster.
And then, I wake up.
Now, by all accounts, this should be a nightmare, this should be horrifying… But its not. The first couple of times it was, sure. But I have had my dreams end this way 8 or so times in my life, and I have grown to enjoy the falling sensation, I know there is nothing I can do, nothing to stop myself falling, so I let it happen, and I enjoy it. Last night however, there was something new. The ladder was taller than it has ever been before, about 15 meters. and when I was about 10 meters up, A girl had started to climb up aswell. By the time I reached the top she were getting close, and by the time I realised the ladder was going to fall, she had caught up. And then the ladder fell back, I gripped the it tight to my chest, feeling the falling sensation all through my body, I let myself enjoy it. But as we both fell, I could hear the horrified screams of the girl below me, all the way to the ground.
And then, I woke up.
I have always believed that some dreams reflect whats going on in your subconscious. Recurring ones even more so. But I’m not going to interpret any of this dream because I don’t think there is any way I could ever properly understand it, and I don’t much see the point in trying. But it is rather curious none the less.
